It happened again

I found out I was pregnant towards the end of February. I had missed my period for over five days , my menses are never late. So I did a home pregnancy test and afterwards called my husband with the good news. He was over the moon with excitement and so was I. We had been trying to conceive for a while and for us this was an answered prayer. Taji was finally going to have a sibling!

When my husband came home I begged him to take me for a proper pregnancy blood test, I didn’t want to get too excited ,a tiny part of me was feeling paranoid that probably I had imagined the two positive lines on the home pregnancy test. We went and the test was positive! The joy properly checked in and we decided to share the good news with our loved ones. Sharing the news was a conscious decision, an act of faith because we truly believed that nothing bad was going to happen .

But it did.

Two weeks ago we went for our first ultrasound, the baby wasn’t a figment of my imagination. He or she was there , the ultrasound recorded the baby’s heartbeat. Due to my previous miscarriage the doctor wanted to be cautious and put me on cardisprin and progesterone just to do everything possible to maintain the pregnancy. We were to visit the doctor a week later for another ultrasound.

It was a bright sunny Friday. As we drove to hospital, I remember looking up at the blue sky and thinking to myself nothing bad can happen today! It was such a beautiful day. I couldn’t wait to hear the sound of the baby’s heartbeat. Hubby and I arrived at the doctor’s reception and we were ushered in do an ultrasound. I lay on the bed and the sonographer began her examination.

I could see the image on the screen, but there was dead silence. She kept probing, more silence. She asked me again for the date of my last period .I told her. She asked my husband for a copy of our previous ultrasound. He handed it to her, she glanced at it and then back at the screen. Then she finally said I can’t find the heartbeat, I will have to call your oby/gyn. She walked out to call him, he was in another office seeing other patients.

I sat up on the bed , clung to my husband and wept my heart out.

My worst fear had presented itself. We were losing our second baby. Why? How? Our child already had a name! He / she was already loved. We had already started making plans! How could God allow this to happen again?

The sonographer walked back in and requested that I allow her to try again. She did her probing, still no heartbeat. Her next words were familiar. ‘This is nature’s way of getting rid of an abnormality.’

We both said nothing. Hubby helped me to dress and we walked out and headed to see the ob/gyn. He had already received the news. He didn’t want to make a final diagnosis of miscarriage . He asked us to wait for the weekend to pass and have a second ultrasound at a more advanced facility on Monday.

The next two days went by like a blur. My husband was holding onto the hope that a miracle could still happen. I was already mourning.

Monday arrived we had the ultrasound, a different doctor confirmed that I had experienced a miscarriage. I was supposed to be 8 weeks, but the baby had stopped growing at 6 weeks. There was nothing more to say. No miracle had happened over the weekend.

After the ultrasound the doctor asked us to go back to our ob/gyn. He planned to pass his findings by phone before we got to his office.

By that time I was numb, tears kept streaming down my face. By the time we got to his office I had composed myself. We walked into his office and we began the discussion on how we were going to rid the body of our dead baby. I wanted to go for a D &C, a quick and fast procedure, like the first time. The sweet comfort of anaesthesia, and to wake up to an empty womb. The doctor was against it. He felt that the foetus was still tiny and could be dealt with using medication. I was to take meds and go home and wait to bleed out.

People, let me say that nothing prepared me what came next . Last Wednesday I took Cytotec at midnight, 48 hours after my dose of Mediprist .I began to experience familiar pains. I was having contractions. I began to bleed. The contractions continued to get stronger the pain unbearable. I had to wake up my husband to get a hot water bottle and pain killers. I couldn’t believe that I was experiencing the pains that result in the bringing forth of a newborn. What manner of cruel fate was this? Hadn’t we suffered enough?

I experienced the contractions from 12.30 until you 5am when I felt a blob leave my body and immediately the pain stopped. I went to the bathroom looked down and I saw a tiny figure on my pad. I stared at it for a long time. I felt an indescribable sadness. After changing my clothes I walked back to our bedroom and told my husband .He also looked at it and then came back to our bed. We just held each other and tried to sleep. After a whole night of madness we were both exhausted.

It has been five days I am still bleeding. I know it will stop soon. We have had alot of support from close friends and family. The visits have kept us strong. Our fridge is full, our house has been full of love and laughter and prayer. When the guests leave we try and sleep. I can’t remember the last time I slept for a full night. Hubby and I keep telling each other that this feels like a movie. Like all this happened to someone else. We have experienced a deep loss And maybe one day soon I will stop feeling like a lost soul drifting on the open seas. Looking out into a deep deep darkness.

It happened again. Only God knows why.

See you soon our little angels. Mummy and Dad will always love you.


Koinonia Education Centre

The past two years have been a journey of self-discovery. As the year 2017 drew to a close I was able to experience moments of total clarity in terms of my goals for the year 2018. My main goal this year is to do more to help others. I do acknowledge that I do not have millions stored away in the bank but I do have ideas that I can share towards projects that are working towards transforming lives. So today I want to share with you the story about a project that is close to my heart.

Koinonia Picture


I was raised in a Christian home by parents who have always been active in the church. When we were very young my parents together with Japanese missionaries living in Kenya started a church. They called it Kyuna Christian Fellowship, Loresho.  It didn’t take them long to realise that there was a need for quality education for the children in the neighbouring slums of Kibagare. Koinonia  Education Centre was then established in 2003 with a student population of 13  kindergarten-aged children. The school continued to grow and eventually they had to seek for larger premises to accommodate the growing number of students.

This brought them to their current location at St Stephen’s  ACK  church hall in Redhill off Limuru road.

Koinonia is a purely non-profit organisation that runs solely on donations from well-wishers. It is through these funds that enabled the school to acquire a piece of land in Mai-Mahiu with the hope of releasing themselves from the high costs of rent and finally settling down in their own ‘home’.


I have watched the school grow over the years, seen the transformation in the kids, seen my parents and the management team toil over the years to ensure that the Koinonia vision continues to succeed and flourish. Finally I have accepted the call in my heart to help out in telling their story   with the hope that you will send your donations towards the project to build a school in Mai Mahiu.

No amount is too little, no amount is too much. Find it in your heart to join this noble cause. I will be happy to provide as much information as you require. In the coming months, I will be sharing ways in which you can participate in fundraising for Koinonia Education Centre.


In the meantime check out the links below and read more about the Koinonia story.







Monthly Health

Today’s post will be completely different from my regular posts.I have been meaning to write a product review for a while now so here we go!

I literally stumbled across this product whilst attending the Koroga Festival a month ago. The lady at the stand introduced me to a whole range of products made from Moringa powder. After trying out all the tea samples and listening to the list of their benefits I settled on trying out the Beauty Me Organic herb and spice tea.


The first thing I will say is their packaging is fantastic. The classiest tin I have ever seen for herbal tea. This particular tea I was told would help me before and during my monthly period. In the past, my PMS symptoms have been getting more and more pronounced to the point of suffering from depression and extremely low energy levels. I felt like this sounded like the cure for all my problems. This is the second month since I began taking this tea and I can honestly say it has helped to counteract the hormonal rollercoaster that I usually undergo. Like today I was feeling extremely nauseous and after taking the tea the urge to throw up disappeared.

The tea is packaged in its natural state, all you do to prepare it is take and pour a tea-spoonful into a boiling cup of hot water. Let it steep for five minutes then drink. You can choose to sieve out the contents or drink as it is. Sometimes I add a little organic honey to sweeten the taste.

Definitely, worth the money I spent, I will be a return customer once it is finished.



PS : This is not a sponsored post ( I WISH) check out the rest of their products on the pages below.


Website : https://www.me.or.ke/

Instagram: memoringaforlife

Facebook : https://www.facebook.com/memoringakenya/

Stay healthy!





Raising a strong-willed child.

One of the things I always strive to do as a writer is to be open as much as possible. If I cannot be authentic about my experiences as a parent then what is the point of this blog?  I know you enjoyed my previous post on Taji’s cute toddler lingo, but today you will be enjoying the ‘ugly ‘ truth about raising this cutie.

Before I continue first some background facts.If I was to describe my personality I’d say I am more intuitive than anything else. My husband, on the other hand, is a doer. I’d relate him to a charging bull sometimes ! ( hides ). My 21-month toddler appears to be taking his personality traits. She is extremely confident, is not afraid to speak her mind and likes everything her way.

I find myself struggling daily with whether to discipline her or try and decipher what her latest tantrum is trying to communicate. Let me give an example, earlier today I had her repeating the word water over and over again. I was in another room and didn’t go running to see what was going on because I knew I had left her water bottle close to her in case she gets thirsty.  After a few minutes of her saying it over and over, she came to find me. She marched over to the laundry basket and picked a t-shirt and took off. I chased her down and tried to take it back and she screamed in frustration! I took a breath and in that instance where I was tempted to spank her,  decided to give it back to her and asked her to show me the water.

She took the t-shirt and ran off towards the sitting room and led me to a puddle of water on the floor. She then proceeded to wipe the water with the t-shirt. That for me was an aha moment in this parenting journey. I felt proud of her for knowing that she needed to clean up the mess that she had created after pouring some water. If I had spanked her and moved on I wouldn’t have ‘listened’ to what she was trying to tell me. I will try and remember to take a breath the next time she pulls a mind numbing tantrum that makes me want to hand her over to the highest bidder!There are times I feel like she is possessed by an evil spirit because of the never ending crying spells and tantrums and the word MINE! being repeated over and over. On days like that, I feel depleted and like someone has sucked out all my energy. As much as I do not like chaos, as a parent I have no choice. I have to dive into the chaos and continue to learn how to correctly raise and discipline my strong willed child.

I hope and pray that I do not spank her too much, that in my disciplining I do not stifle her creativity and confidence. There will be times for the ‘rod’ and there will be times to listen. May I always have the wisdom and the patience to figure it all out in the journey ahead.

How do you discipline your child?  How do you deal with tantrums? Do you believe in spanking or talking? I found this infographic on this page HERE that I think is pretty helpful to decipher a child’s behaviour.

Infograph source : http://www.infoforfamilies.com/blog/2013/6/12/how-to-raise-a-happy-successful-and-cooperative-child-while-disciplining-less

How to Style a toddler’s natural hair.

1.Gather all and I mean ALL the items required for the mission ahead.All items in the photo are necessary.
2.Pick Toddler as she runs away from mummy.Take spray bottle and liberally spray water all over her head.

3.Toddler will have squirmed away from you in protest at the liquid dripping on her head.

4 .Pick TV remote and pass it to the toddler to appease her (she loves the remote , feel free to use whatever silences your toddler).

5.Take leave in conditioner and apply on her head.Use the brush to comb and  smoothen out any tangles .

6.Toddler is protesting again , shush her and threaten to go on your outing and  leave her at home.When that doesn’t work (it doesn’t work) hand her the thermometer to play with.

7 .Take the comb and quickly divide hair into sections and use the hair bands to style as you desire.

8.After you have finished , you will realise that you did not divide the hair into neat sections.

9.Shrug and move on with your life.

10.I wanted ten points ,so consider this a space filler. happy styling 😎

Throwback BIRTH-day


Taji- One day old

I have a confession to make, I must admit I have been feeling broody lately. Especially when I see tiny baby boys. I melt on the inside and if the baby belongs to a friend of mine, I have to spend some time holding him. Aaaaah, that new baby smell . That experience of enjoying the cuddliness of a new-born baby, is almost enough to cause amnesia. The kind of amnesia that almost completely erases the experience of  the first few months of parenthood. I said almost. A few hours later after the newborn novelty has worn off. It all comes back to me, and I literally have a conversation with my ovaries.’ Stop it  DON’T even think about it!’ I am definitely not ready  for another one, at least not yet.

Lets throwback on my birth-day , and I will show you exactly what I mean.

DISCLAIMER : I will get descriptive. You have been warned


I had a natural birth which I am thankful for, yes I am. However the pain is unbearable. Forgive me but I will have to use CAPS in this section just to emphasize what it felt like.

My water broke early and after waiting for a whole day, my OB-GYN advised us to allow him to induce labor. The pain is indescribable. I remember the hospital nurse explaining what would happen as she attached me to the drip. I remember her saying it would take about an hour for the drugs to take effect. LIEEEEES! I remember distinctly feeling the drugs coursing through my body and the contractions starting instantly. Nothing prepares you for that.  If labor progresses as it should, there are breaks between contractions where a mother can take a breather  untill the next contraction. There was no such break for me. The contractions are seconds apart, and so is the pain. I had an amazing midwife/doula who helped me through breathing exercises that helped. But still , THE PAIN. Lucky for me my labor only lasted four hours .but still, THE PAIN.


Syntosin, a drug used to induce labor


Thankful for small mercies, therefore Taji was tiny so I didn’t tear and therefore I didn’t need stitches afterwards.

2. Breastfeeding

As a new mum I shed a lot of tears and still feel sad to date that I was unable to breastfeed my daughter for at least the first year of her life. I had so much milk after birth, it was so much I had to keep changing my hospital gown every few hours as I overflowed. During my hospital stay the nurses literally used to drag my nipples and place them into her mouth to show me how to feed her. It was degrading and painful and never seemed to work. She would suck for a few seconds and then cry and cry for hours until she fell asleep. I remember one nurse telling me it was my breasts that had a problem and  after fashioning  a plastic syringe to her liking, she used the air vacuum to repeatedly pop up my nipple. The  discomfort is out of this world.

Nothing worked, she just never did latch properly . When we got home I started expressing milk and feeding her with a bottle. The poor thing hungrily finished it up. During our first Doctor’s appointment she had gone down to two kilograms. The milk I had wasn’t enough, she kept losing weight and eventually we bought formula and never looked back. She drank expressed breast milk for two months and then I went completely  dry.


What we fed Taji on until she was weaned


In hindsight I took the whole breastfeeding experience for granted. I didn’t think she would ‘reject’ her food.Maybe I should have fed her with a cup and spoon, no one told me that. I will get a lactation consultant  next time around , who knows maybe It may help.

3.Growth Spurts /Sleep deprivation/ Teething , they all happen together.

In my experience from around four months, we never seemed to sleep normally again. Once we introduced her to formula  she slept well, from 11pm to around 6am. After four months  sleep became elusive  until around 9 months. I do not know what happened.My husband will tell you I should have let her cry. ( He blames me for her bad sleeping habits ha-ha). I even attended a sleep seminar (ha-ha let me laugh at myself). Nothing  worked and eventually  she set her own sleep schedule. She is asleep right now, on the sofa  . She had slept an hour ago and then woke up. It seems to me she stays up for her dad and rarely settles down until he comes home ( ha-ha it is your fault George). All I know sleep deprivation drove me up the wall. Days merge into each other and the exhaustion never ends. Even when she would  sleep through the night the sleep was never enough. There was so much ‘sleep backlog’ to catch up on.

One day she will sleep at normal hours , without waking up even once until then we trudge on.

4.Hospital Stay

Taji was born in a private room in a private hospital. The labor ward had amazing nurses and  my doctor and mid wife were the best.I loved my experience . After birth I was moved to my own private room. The nurses there were the worst. I  learned later that new mothers are supposed to get a chance to rest and recover from birth as they keep the baby in the nursery. She was with me throughout . I never did get to sleep anyway. The nurses during the night shift would blast loud reggae music for hours on end. It wasn’t until my husband complained that they would turn it down.

Secondly , my OB-GYN cleared me to go home after two days.The hospital pediatrician who was present at birth did not clear Taji for discharge. Apparently they had sent a culture to the lab that would take 36hours for results to show . She was concerned that Taji may have an infection. We had no reason to not trust her judgement. We ended up staying from Tuesday to Saturday. During this period we never got a full report as to what was happening. It was a cat and mouse game with the nurses and  pediatrician who changed with every shift. One would tell us the results were out , the other would say they were not ready. Eventually my husband , the poor sweet man who had been spending the night on the little sofa in my hospital room  to give me support as I tried to breastfeed , finally demanded to see the results and suddenly they were ready and voila the culture showed that there was nothing to worry at. Ofcourse by then my maternity cover had been depleted .

We know better now , if we do have a baby in a hospital next time we will have our own trusted pediatrician who will guide us through the process and if there are any concerns explain them better .


5. Domestic managers

My husband and I love our space and had decided that when the baby was born that we would survive without a live in nanny/house help. I was able to hire and train a young lady with the help of my mother in law. She would come early morning and leave in the evening. She was a good cook and cleaned the house well . BUT a month later she was giving me sob stories and asking me to lend her a huge amount of money. I declined, a days later she sent me a text asking me to  give her some stuff from our house. I declined. Then I accidentally found out she was 6 months pregnant  A Fact that she had not told me about during the interview .I then saw her with  some of my stud earrings that I had put aside in a drawer as they were not pairs anymore. I did not feel like this was someone I could trust my child with let alone my house . She was gone . Since then we have not hired anyone on permanent basis. Maybe this year we will be lucky


When I look back at this collection of stories I am more amused than traumatized. We had a baby and survived through the grace and strength of GOD.

Maybe we will do this again.







We made it


First post of the year. I feel truly blessed to be alive to see another year come to be. I am not one for making New year resolutions because if anything 2016 taught me , it is that resolving to get through each day is enough. After all tomorrow is not promised, we only have today .

So ,it is 11.12 pm , the house is quiet save for the music i am listening to as i write. Hubby and Taji are asleep . It feels good to have a few minutes to myself. Our baby is now a 14 month old toddler, she has boundless energy . This week she decided to fully start walking. It feels surreal. In my eyes she is a walking,breathing miracle. My heart explodes with joy at-least 20 times a day as I reflect on just how much she has grown. I still have not mastered this motherhood thing.Let me show you just what i mean.

1.Sleeping Schedule

Pray tell, what does that even mean? I gave up trying to sleep train Taji. She has  a mind of her own, and yes Mama doesn’t have the heart to let her cry it out. I tried everything, i read all the books and articles online. She sleeps when she wants and in our bed. DO not judge me , yes i see you, you with the perfectly sleep trained baby who sleeps in their own room. Move along , nothing to see here. I feed her, give her a bath, read her a story,pray with her, give her a last bottle for the day and put her down. Sometimes she sleeps sometimes she decides shes staying up until Daddy comes home. She then sleeps with us for about an hour then i put her in her bed.

I stopped feeling guilty about not having a sleep trained baby. I put her in our bed one exhausted night when she was teething and going through a growth spurt and she finally fell asleep. I figure she wont be with us much longer as she needs to move to the next room. Stay tuned, let us see how that goes!

2. Feeding

Taji eats as she sits in her feeding chair. Thankfully she eats well. She is now fully weaned and eats whatever we eat, spices and all.Depending on her day to day appetite i will feed her three meals or smaller ones spaced out through the day. Including fruits and water  to keep her hydrated especially in this hot January weather. We were lucky that she transitioned to whole cow milk without trouble , yes there was a celebration in our house when we stopped buying formula. Kshs 1050 per tin, how did we do it? God truly provides.


If you do not already know, Taji is a fully fledged daddy’s girl. She says mama maybe twice a week, and Dada 50 million times a day. The injustice ! Oh well. She now says Mama, Dada, pupu (when she poops) hi and ba-byeeee , and sings /hums along to her  favourite YouTube videos. Our daughter is a dancer (yeah she got that from me, I had a short career as a dancer ha-ha). She can stand upright and now takes lots of steps around the house. At the rate she is going she will be running by the end of the month. My baby is growing up. Bittersweet.

4.Social life

My daughter loves people thankfully. Mama not so much. Whenever we go for social gatherings i struggle to keep up with the conversations. I used to be a social butterfly ,guess that happens when your daily companion is a baby. Social media doesn’t help  ,i wistfully watch as all my friends go on with their lives. I miss having an ADULT best friend, one that i can call and go for coffee with and laugh as we catch up and talk about our lives.

So in a nutshell, that is where we are at. I have a happy healthy baby , a happy marriage and for that I am thankful for. I am praying a lot as I figure out the next step for me. I need to work on becoming whole , reconnect with the social being that I was, reconnect with my gifts that are meant to be shared with the world. Getting out of this mummy hole with my dark thoughts is proving hard. But I have made a few steps out and each day it gets better and better.

Thank God we made it.

Happy 2017 everyone.

Afraid to be Female

I grew up in Golf Estate phase one near Kenyatta Market in Nairobi. I remember   hating been sent to the shops by my parents.There was always a group of older boys idling on the street corners who would whistle at me and shout all manner of words from across the street.I remember feeling my  stomach constrict and my heart racing whenever I would approach that corner. It didn’t matter whether I crossed the street to avoid them or quickened my steps .Nothing was going to stop them from having their fun.Worst part was I’d have to go through it twice as I headed back from the shops. I remember always feeling scared, hoping and hoping with all my little heart that I wouldn’t find them.The relief I’d feel on the days that they weren’t there could fill up a whole room.

Fast forward to a few years later , I was now old enough to go for driving classes.My parents paid for me to attend them at a driving school on Tom Mboya street in town.It was an exciting time for me as this was my perceived first step towards independence.My dreams were shattered when I met my driving instructor.Every morning without fail he would find an excuse to put his hand on my thigh as I  was driving. It made me feel so uncomfortable and scared.This stranger felt he had the right to do as he pleased without a care in the world.I would push his hand off and tell him to stop.He didn’t.I finally told my mum and the very next day she accompanied to the school and she raised hell in their offices.She didn’t even give the managers a chance to respond and we walked out of that driving school  (thanks for defending me mum).I was enrolled into another school the next week to do the driving test, suffice to say I failed and after that whole unnerving experience, I decided I was done with driving. Until I met my husband years later and he encouraged me to resit the test and I finally got my driving license.

There are many many stories I could write about today , experiences that made me wish I was a man. Why am I telling you all these stories ? Because yesterday a lady posted on twitter about her experience with an Orange Kenya employee.This guy had the audacity to retrieve her number and send her his photo and a WhatsApp chat .He wanted to get to know her better. I was outraged at the breach of privacy.The level of entitlement that this man portrayed. It gets worse,  the responses on social media were AGAINST her for sharing the whole experience on twitter.Very few people stood up for her.She was abused and told off.She should have been happy that a man was hitting on her , never mind how he got her number.What is wrong with the world today?My soul was bleeding by the time I went to bed last night.The saddest part to this whole story, majority of the stone throwers and the nasty insults towards this lady  came from women.

We as women are taught not to get raped, to dress decently so that we don’t attract rapists and tempt men to act on their desire .That’s the message we hear growing up.

Boys will be boys.Let’s excuse their bad behavior after all that is how they were created. That is the message we hear growing up.

I learnt to be afraid at a young age ,and now this Orange Kenya experience has shown me that I need to be very , very afraid for my daughter. 

The comments on social media are a mirror revealing our true nature.Our thoughts give birth to our actions.And judging by what I read last night. God help us all.

I will do my best to teach Taji to stand up for herself whenever she feels disrespected and to feel free to tell me about any incidents because like my mother before me, I will defend her honor.

Let us stop excusing any form of harassment and maybe one day the women can finally stop being afraid to be female.


For the past few days my mind has been on an incident that happened in my life 8 years ago. I have been having a difficult month since my last blog post and I do tend to feel sorry for myself. I get distracted by my current situation and I forget to look back and see how far God has brought me. I have been praying for miracles in my life , well I remembered one major one 8 years ago.Do you believe in angels? Well, I do.

The year was 2008 .The month of September . It was a Thursday morning and I was a passenger on a motorcycle with a friend. We had barely been on the road 20 minutes when a  security vehicle rammed into us. When I say us, I mean me. The car literally rammed into my left leg and I was thrown off. I still remember vividly the feeling of flying through the air and landing on the tarmac. I rolled and stopped and for a few seconds time stood still. I lifted up my head , I could move. I tried to get up and that is when I noticed that my left leg was facing in the opposite direction, mangled and broken. And that is when the pain hit me. I remember screaming aloud ‘my leg ,my leg will I ever walk again.’ The passengers in the vehicle that had hit me came out to help and were now trying to lift me off the tarmac into their vehicle. The pain was too much, they were causing  more harm than good. Then a white lady came out of nowhere and asked them to put me down. She knelt down beside me took my hand and asked me my name . She then told me her name was Debbie. She said she was a nurse and that her and husband would take me to hospital. She basically took over the situation. She instructed the men on how to carry me carefully and to put me on the back seat of their car. I remember it was a white car , she sat at the front next to her husband whose name was Aram, he was driving .My friend who was on the motorcycle with me sat on the back seat beside me and we left the accident scene.

I remember the husband talking and saying they were Christian missionaries heading to visit their friend when they say the accident.  I remember he said I would be okay and he began to pray for me.He prayed all the way to hospital. The nearest hospital was Karen hospital was five minutes away from the accident scene and we got there pretty fast. He drove towards the emergency entrance, Debbie ran inside and came out with two nurses and a stretcher. She again took over the situation and instructed them what to do.She helped with the admission, made sure that i was comfortable ,made sure that the nurses were checking on me and carrying out the initial first aid procedures. By this time my Father had been called, and this couple said they would stay with me until he arrived. My dad arrived shortly after, and after he talked to me and heard what had happened he turned around to thank the couple for being so helpful and bringing me to hospital. They wanted to leave at this point and my dad asked Debbie for her telephone number so that we could contact them later to properly thank them. She said she didn’t have a phone. So my father turned to her husband and he evaded the question .With my dad’s insistence he finally gave him  a number and they left.

About two weeks later after i had been discharged I remembered to ask my dad for the telephone number . I dialled it. The number didn’t exist. It didn’t ring, it wasn’t engaged,it didn’t exist.

It took me two years to heal from my injury , it was a grueling journey with three surgeries and multiple physiotherapy sessions.8 years later I think about that day, and I remember that my father telling me that morning of the accident, God had urged him to pray for me . He didn’t know why but he did. Was it a coincidence ,that couple happened to be on that road when the accident happened? Was it a coincidence that Debbie was a nurse and therefore knew what to do to take care of me to ensure that I was taken care of and even prevented me from further injury as I was being bundled into the security vehicle after the accident? Was it a coincidence that both of them ,a couple from another country didn’t have cell phones even though they were missionaries living away from home? Why were they so attentive, so caring why did they stay with me until my father arrived?

I believe they were angels, no doubt about it. And I am forever grateful that I am here today to tell this story.

Psalms 91:11

11 For he will command his angels concerning you
    to guard you in all your ways;





Half a year of milestones

First off happy Mother’s day to every mother out there. I believe God has given us the strength to get up everyday and keep trudging on , this motherhood journey isn’t easy ,but It gets better everyday,

I woke up today feeling energetic and actually felt like writing . I must admit it has been a while since I felt like that. The irony is my husband and I barely slept last night. After midnight yesterday Miss T kept waking up every hour. We tried everything , I fed her, soothed her, changed her diaper , checked if she was cold, nothing worked. She wanted to play! Here was my daughter giggling and kicking and talking and crying. While all we wanted to do was sleep.At some point I was so groggy from sleep that after picking her up I tripped like a drunk and knocked her little hand into the wall. Yeah that didn’t help matters she wasn’t hurt but she cried even louder. Finally earlier this morning she pooped and blacked out into a deep sleep. Halleluyah!

Important lesson here she started weaning and kept passing gas all day but no poop, so the combination of going through her six month growth spurt and not pooping is equals to no sleep for everrrrrrrrrrrrybody.

So here I am at 11 am this morning,blogging,  with a still sleeping baby and sniffing the heavenly smell of pancakes that the hubby is making (yayy for mother’s day ! )

So to celebrate her recent 6 month birth date I will share with you the milestones that she has gone through.

1.Laughing out loud

The sound of Miss T laughing out loud is beautiful. It comes from deep inside her belly. It makes me smile and cry and causes my heart to self combust with joy. It causes me to Praise God for all his blessings.

2.Sitting up

Between 4-6 months Miss T began to sit up all on her own. In the beginning she would sit up and her head would bop around like those little dolls put at the front of the car. Shortly after sitting up she would topple over like an overweight penguin losing their balance. Cutest thing ever. So I ensure she has tummy time to strengthen her muscles and now shes definitely getting better at sitting up without been assisted.

3.Hand and finger co-ordination.

One day Miss T woke up and discovered she has fingers. She can stare at them for an extended period of time. I can almost hear her thoughts as she looks at them.” What are these? What do they do? Look mum I can stretch and fold these thingies all by myself. I have an over imaginative mind and liken her staring intently at her fingers like those cartoon evil villain characters plotting to take over the world.. bwahahahaha.

Where was I? Yes she can now grip onto toys with her hands and shake them repeatedly until they fall onto the floor and then she cries. Mama picks up the toy and hands it over to baby.Miss T shakes the toy until it falls onto floor and cries. Repeat to infinity!

She also uses her hands to knock the sides of her cot repeatedly when she wakes up and wants to be picked up. If we don’t hear that she starts to scratch the same sides with her fingers. It sounds like finger nails on a chalkboard  and gets mama to pick her up real quick. Hmmmm this child. And speaking about fingers she chews and sucks on her fingers like its a piece of sugar cane. Actually at this point everything goes into her mouth. I don’t stop her though , i just make sure whatever it is , is clean.

4. Facial Recognition

Yes like the software . Her internal software recognises her people. She lights up when she sees people she knows. Especially her dad and mum. Who am I kidding ESPECIALLY her dad. She even gives him puppy dog eyes when he prepares to leave for work. hahaha you are in trouble George when she starts to crawl or walk and talk. You ain’t leaving this house unless you sneak out.

5. Mummypulation

A clever term that my sister Mwende came up with and oh Boy have I experienced it.She could be fussing and whining and I hand her over to someone else and she calms down. How does a six month old already know that if she does certain things mama will do her bidding? She has even learned to shout if I ignore her for too long , like right now!

Yes she’s awake need to type real quick.


6. Separation anxiety

Mum’s not Taji’s . I have left her for a full day with  George’s mum and she didn’t go on a hunger strike or cry incessantly . She plays, eats , sleeps as normal and for that I am grateful. I wont deny that i cried the first time I left her for a full day. I almost didn’t make it to the car.

And so the journey continues . Will be posting later this week to share my weaning journey so far

Wishing God’s blessings to every woman who is a mother figure to those around you. The world is a little better because you are here.